Stand Up Straight and Learn Your
E-mail MannersI get truckloads of letters imploring me to address the universal lack of e-mail etiquette. From that infernal "Reply to All" button in Microsoft Outlook® 2002 to server-choking graphic files, let's take a look at some of the top cyber-discourtesies that are driving us all nuts.
How many e-mails do you send and receive each day? 10? 20? 50? More? (I'm in the "More" category — about four times more. Wonder why I don't write you back?) Frankly, I've got a bee in my bonnet about the way some people are abusing their e-mail privileges. And from the sound of your letters, I'm not alone. Let's tackle some of the bigger issues and see if we can't make this a kinder, gentler cyberworld.
I'm going to run through this list quickly, so please try and keep up. In fact, why don't you print this list, frame it nicely, and hang it next to your computer.
Imagine that you've received a piece of company-wide e-mail from someone in your very large organization. If you feel the need to respond to the sender, rest assured that every member of your very large organization does not want to have to read your reply, no matter how witty or urbane you may think it is. This goes the same for personal e-mail (especially if it's an Internet joke or rumor).
For example, I'm fairly certain that Bill Gates doesn't need to know if I'll be attending the annual Microsoft picnic with one child or twelve. Not that he doesn't care, mind you; he just has other types of e-mail that may be more pressing. Shocking but true. So please, don't hit that Reply to All button.
USING ALL CAPITAL LETTERS IS NOT ONLY RUDE AND IRRITATING, IT'S ALSO HARD TO READ. Save your caps for special occasions, such as those times when you want your recipient to know you're shouting. GOT IT?
(For all of you who love to use background color and stationery for your personal
e-mail, please disregard this next crab. This one is for you people at the
office. )
I know it's important to you that everyone knows you're creative, arty, and
colorful. Your cubicle fairly screams kitsch; how could we not know? But we're
at work here, and I don't want to have to hippity-hop through your "bunnies
'n love" stationery just to figure out what your message is.
If I send you a nice note and then get a response from you that, at first glance, appears to have only what I wrote to you at the top of it, I'm going to assume you have nothing to say to me (and sent me an empty e-mail to tell me as much).
Let's put this another way: When you're replying to an e-mail and you want to include what the sender wrote, add your comments at the top of the mail, not the bottom. I know what I wrote — why would I want to reread it?
I do see the logic in keeping all the notes and replies in order (my original e-mail on top, followed by your reply, followed by my reply to your reply, and so on). Well, it may be like that in the snail mail world, but we're not in Kansas anymore, Toto. Adapt. Your reply on top, please — this isn't a chain letter. (And if it is, don't send it to me. But that's a crab of a different color.)
Speaking of chain letters, if you're like me (and I know you are), you are fed up with receiving the same jokes, Internet rumors, and chain letters promising free cases of champagne, $1000 from Bill Gates, and miracle cream that erases all your fine lines and bad memories.
Has someone sent you one too many stupid e-mails? You know how it is: When Great Auntie Cornelia first discovers how easy it is to log on and get connected, she believes that everything coming from that Great Oracle of Misinformation we call the Web is true. And she thinks it's her responsibility to warn, notify, or enlighten — with each issue in a separate e-mail — all 162 of her closest relatives, friends, neighbors, and folks whose business cards she found on the beauty shop floor.
Now, while you can cut Auntie C (as well as the others who are part of your personal life) some slack, it's just not appropriate, considerate, professional, or even cool to forward these useless things to coworkers. (And by the way: Mikey, the kid from a 1970s-era cereal commercial, did not explode after eating a popular cola laced with fizzy candy. I don't know where he is, but he's probably going through a mid-life crisis right about now.)
To add someone to the Junk Senders list in Outlook
If you've got something to say to me that is:
...please do it in person. (Actually, I prefer you don't do it all.) Sentient beings are filled with emotions (and NOT emoticons). E-mail programs aren't the best translators of this.
As I see it, there are three main reason why you should refrain from sending really large files via e-mail:
So please consider the size the file you're sending. If it's a large image, make it smaller. If it's large document, zip it up. (If you don't know what I mean, look in the More information section.)
In other words, fill out the Subject line. I get hundreds of e-mails each day, and when I get one without anything in the Subject line, I tend to skip over it. If the subject of the e-mail wasn't important enough for the sender to fill out the Subject line, then it's not important to me. Be gone!
If someone sends you mail in plain text format, you can usually tell because: 1) It has no formatting, and 2) The font it appears in is Courier. If you decide to reply in a plain-text sender using HTML format with special fonts and formatting, the text that your recipient receives will look like indecipherable nonsense that needs a Cold War code-breaker to untangle its message. Do your recipients a favor: Send your reply in the format it came in. Or, if you're really a people-pleaser (yup, that'd be me), try this.
To specify the default format for all messages to a particular contact
If you haven't set this up for all contacts, when you create a new e-mail message, Outlook uses a default format that's specified for all e-mail messages you create. Some people choose plain text because even though it doesn't have the bells and whistles of HTML, at least they know that their recipients will get the message loud and clear, plain and simple.
You're hot under the collar and everybody knows that (and sometimes loves that) about you. But before sending your clever and scathing message out there to the world (with virtually no chance of retrieving it), remember this: The pushing of the Send button lasts a moment; its effects can last a lifetime — or at least until you're back on the streets, looking for another job.
One last thing: I don't want to imply, with the above list, that you can't have fun, be light, or be creative in e-mail. Some of you have gotten to know me a bit in these past months together, and I'm sure you can imagine that I've had some trouble myself with e-mail etiquette. (No! It's true!) I'm just telling you to think before sending.
The Crabby Office Lady gets her column ideas from your far-out suggestions
and demands. Write to her at crabby@Microsoft.com.
While she can't answer your mail, you may see a solution to your problem in a
future column.
I know you have a lot to say. And there is a place for you to say it (and listen
what others have to say too, and perhaps learn a few things): The
Microsoft Office Newsgroups.